


The Olive Fic

by AngelAgainstAWindow (orphan_account)



Category: Smosh
Genre: Gay Panic, Gen, M/M, Multi, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-09
Updated: 2019-06-09
Packaged: 2020-04-23 08:33:48
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 860
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19147381
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/AngelAgainstAWindow
Summary: Lasercorn never thought it would end up like this.Little did he know, everything is not what it seems.





	The Olive Fic

Lasercorn walked into the room, gasping gay-ly as Greg the Sound Guy™ approached him, dressed as a bunch of Green Olives™ (the obviously sexy food)

 

"H-hewwo?" Lasercorn spoke, terrified of the gay shit that was about to go down.

 

"Hello, it is I, God." Lasercorn was confused, as the voice didn't come from Greg the Sound Guy™, but rather the multitude of the sexy Green Olives™ of sex™

 

"Oh my god I'm going to fuck that olive." Lasercorn sobbed, micropenis-ly.

 

"My coochie itch™" The Olive™ spoke again.

 

Lasercorn smirked, his pants now gone. "What the fuck where did my pants go?" He stared down at his micropenis. 

 

Greg The Sound Guy™ stood there, an unloving, unmoving shell, there only to serve the Olives™

 

"Mining away." The Olives™ spoke softly and sensually, asmr-ing, staring at Lasercorn's micropenis, gayly. "I don't know what to mine, except for your tiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiny dick."

 

Rat cage suddenly appeared. "IM BLIND!" She crashed into the wall, and then into Lasercorn's micropenis™ "OH MY GOD ITS SO SMALL"

 

She then vanished.

  
  


_ Courtney M.F Freakin Miller has joined the battle _

"YO! HEY YO BRO LASERPORN!" Courtney M.F Freakin Miller dabbed, screaming aggressively.

 

"DO THE CARPETS MATCH THE DRAPES???" They dabbed again, before sinking into the ground, Thomas Sanders Sanders Sides™ style. They then died, but not for long, as they cannot die, as they are God.

 

Brianna Boho appeared, judging judgingly while judginly judging Laserpenis's micropenis.

"Sister snatched." She was then killed, for being a jum churl stan  off to go be the biggest hoe imaginable in another world.

 

Lasercorn spoke softly. "Oh my stars." He then located his pants and put them on, before attempting to leave the room, but was stopped by Shayne The UnAbashed Slut™, as well as Damien The Other UnAbashed Slut™. (They aren't humble sluts and we all know it)

  
  


"YO BRO LETS GO BE GAY!" Shayne, the shittier half of Damien Haas™ screamed at Damien Haas™

 

"NO BRO THATS SLUTTY PLUS YOU ALSO THREW AWAY MY GOLDEN CAT AND HONESTLY? NOT COOL BRO." Damien spoke, sluttily. (read it in his voice dear god please)

 

Lasercorn sunk to the ground, sobbing as he rocked back and forth, dying both mentally and physically, as apparently Courtney M.F Freakin Miller had managed to reappear for 5 seconds to stab him. Somehow, he didn't notice. Probably because of all of the mental pain he's in right now, honestly I'd be a little scared too 

 

This is what caused all of the angst in @thosedamnsmoshkids/cassthecryptid's fanfic crime does pay, go read it, sluts.

 

Damien threw a pom pom into the air. "LOOKS LIKE YOU NEED MORE TRAINING LASERPENIS! MAYBE IT'LL HELP YOU GET A BIGGER PENIS, INSTEAD OF THAT NEEDLE YOU CALL A PEN PEN! MAYBE SOMEDAY YOU'LL FIND A BAJIMBAS TO MATCH THE SIZE OF YOUR PEN PEN!" He did that amazing ass pose and vanished, Shayne sobbing as his gay boyfriend vanished without him.

 

"GAY RIGHTS!" Shayne Topp, bottom boi, sobbed, vanishing in true anime style.

 

As Laserpenis, the micropenis man sat on the floor, sobbing, the Olives™ made a reappearance. Greg The Sound Guy™ stood there, a corpse, his entire life force stolen by the Olives™ His life served the best purpose it could, fueling the life of the one and only true God, the Olives™

 

"A-are we in the endgame?" Laserpenis cried out to the Olives™

 

"Well, do the peni- carpets match the drapes?"

 

Laserpeepee sobbed as his pants vanished again, revealing that his pubes are, in fact, just a ball of fire. He sobbed as the small needle that is his micropenis, burned into a crisp, leaving him unable to give Tyler a sibling. 

  
  


Lasercorn screamed as he felt a growth beginning to replace his penis. He looked down and saw a tiny Olive™

 

"Hello, Father." The baby Olive™ spoke, sensually licking the microphone and smacking its lips.

 

Lasercorn screamed as the large group of Olives™ smiled, reaching down and plucking the baby Olive™ off of Lasercorn. The Olives™ smiled. "Our new child."

 

Lasercorn finally found his pants, attempting to escape the room, now that the Olives™ were occupied. 

 

Sadly, he was stopped. Gasp oh no oh god.

 

"Hey macarena." Anthony spoke, before turning into an Olive™

 

Lasercorn screamed, as he too, turned into an Olive™

 

"WHERES ANTHONY!" Shayne screamed, before turning into an Olive™ as well. 

 

"Wheres…….. Antho- Olive™" Shayne was stopped from saying Anthony, as the Olive™ Hive Mind™ took over. 

 

The entirety of the Smosh Fandom™ turned into Olives™

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**_Click_ **

 

"What's up! Welcome to another SmOliveSh™ video! Today we're going to be doing an Olive™ Mukbang!"

 

_ The camera pans to tens of thousands of crates of Olives _ ™

 

_ If you listen closely, you hear a faint screaming coming from the crates. Inside the crates, is what used to be the smosh fandom. _

 

"But first!"

_ The camera pans back to the Olive _ ™  _ that is wearing a headset and microphone.  _

 

"A word from our sponsor!"

 

_ An Olive Garden commercial begins to play. You fools. You've been tricked. This wasn't a crack fic. It was an Olive Garden commercial all along. _

 

Olivia suddenly appears. "I am… The Olive™"

  
  
  


The end.


End file.
